Candles for Paige

October 15th is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day.  Please take a moment on this day to say a prayer for all the mommy's and daddy's that have lost a baby.  Whether it be an early miscarriage, a stillborn or a baby that lived a much too short of a life the love for these babies is larger than life and each and every one of them will be greatly missed.

The loss of Paige has completely changed Pat and I.  We are two different people than who we were before Paige's death.  Although her short life brought us so much sorrow and pain, it's her memory and spirit that will live within us forever.

At 7pm please light a candle in memory of Paige.  (This is a tradition on Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day).  It will help keep her spirit alive!  We would love to see a picture of any candles lit in Paige's memory... please send them to me at marissag7@hotmail.com   I will compile all of the pictures and post them soon!

THANKS!

10 Months

This post is 4 days late, so I apologize... life kind of got in the way.  We are 2 months from Landon's 1st birthday.  How is this possible???  A whole year has almost gone by with this amazing blessing!!!  Not a day goes by that I don't thank God and his big sister for the miracle that is Landon.  We just love him so much and love watching him grow into such an independent, strong willed, outgoing toddler (not quite).  Landon is in to everything!  He explores everything first with his hands and then his mouth.  With that said we have to watch him very very carefully at all times.  He is very quick at crawling and can get from room to room faster than us sometimes. He's quite the houdini!  We have found him behind our bedroom curtains, in the shower, on top of the fireplace, and caught under or on many things.  This past month Landon has really let his personality shine and we just love seeing him so happy!

At 10 months Landon is...

*wearing size 3 diapers
*wearing 6-9 month clothes, starting to pull out some 9-12 month stuff
*crawling all over the place
*starting to stand on his own unassisted
*cruising along any furniture and anything he can get his little hands on
*sleeping through the not
*taking 2 naps everyday
*clapping
*doing "so big"
*smiling at anyone who will smile at him
*starting to get very attached to mommy and daddy
*eating 3 meals a day and taking 3 bottles of formula
*enjoying watching big kids play and tries to join in

This months pictures didn't go so well!  Landon is always on the move and sitting still to strike a pose just wasn't happening so here is what we've got to work with....

 

Pedal the Cause

Today my brother, Bill, rode 75 miles in Pedal the Cause in honor of my dad and in memory of Paige. We are so proud of Bill and even more touched that he would do such an event in memory of our sweet angel. Bill raised a lot of money for the cause and all that money will stay here in St. Louis to help find a cure for cancer. It is truly my hope that no family will have to go through another loss of a young child due to cancer. This past year I watched my dad battle for his life. Thankfully he won that fight and is in remission thanks to the hard work of people like my brother who help find a cure!!!

Bill, thank you so much for being such an inspiration! We are so proud of you! I hope you felt the little angel flying over you today. I know Paige made that 75 mile journey with you.

We went out to cheer Bill on. Here he is taking a break at mile 60!

Way to go Bill!!!

October

I'm sure October means many things to many people.  It's Breast Cancer Awareness month.  It's Bully Awareness month.  It's also Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness.  October 15th is the actual day of remembrance, however, many use the entire month to remember their angel.  I sat here tonight pondering this very thought.  Really?  There is a month dedicated to remembering my baby?  As if I don't remember her every single second every single day!  I remember her on the 1st of every month (the day she was born).  I remember her on the 3rd of every month (the day Pat and I made the hardest decision of our lives), I remember her on the 4th of every month (the day she went home to Jesus) and I remember on the 8th of every month (her funeral).  I also remember her every day in between.  I don't really need a month, but yet I realize how important Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness is.  Take a step back and just realize how very precious life is.  What a gift from God every breathe we take truly is.  It's a reality check and it's an opportunity to remember our sweet angels but also to hold on a little tighter to the sweet babies we have in our arms. 

On October 20 my family and many friends will walk in Walk to Remembrance in memory of our precious angel, Paige.  I ask that if you have a spare second this month please say a prayer for the families of all the little angels. 

For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them. - Psalm 139:13-16

We love you, Paige!  We miss you so much and long for the day

 we will hold you in our arms again!

Cousins

Last night the whole family headed to St. Mary's High School for the football game. My dad has announced the games at St. Mary's for many years. We had the alumni room reserved and had a huge pizza party and we celebrated my niece, Isabel's birthday. The kids had a fabulous time. With it being a birthday party my sis in law brought balloons. Green and white balloons (St. Mary's colors). She also brought one pink balloon for Paige. So sweet of her to always be thinking of our angel. At the end of the night after a dragon victory we snapped a picture of ALL the cousins, even Paige. This picture just makes my heart melt because you'll notice Landon going after the pink balloon! I can only imagine if Paige was here... Landon would love holding on to his big sister!

9 Month Pictures

In my last post I gave a little preview of Landon's 9 month photo shoot that my friend, Tara, did for us.  Tara is actually a first grade teacher, but she doubles as an outstanding photographer.  She so generously took these pictures for us and we just picked them up today!  I love them all!  There are 44 pictures in all!!!!  I won't bore you with all of them... I do realize that Pat and I (ok and Grandma and MiMi) are probably the only ones who want to ooh and aah over all 44 pictures.  So here are a few of my favorites!

When did he get so big?????

9 Months

Well, it's official!  Landon has officially been outside of me longer than he was in me!!!  Yay!!  I can't believe we've had him with us for 9 full months.  What a blessing!  It feels like just yesterday we lost his big sister and yet our little man is growing so much and becoming quite the wild man!  It's impossible to describe the love of a mother, yet if you are a mother you completely understand.... I love this sweet boy more than any words could ever describe.  He brings us pure joy everyday!  I can't look at him without smiling and knowing that each day is a gift from God and what a gift Landon truly is! 

Landon has been a busy, busy boy this month.  I can't believe how much he changes from month to month and how much he amazes us with his development.  Here is what Landon is up to...

*wearing size 6 - 9 month clothes (FINALLY!)
*wearing size 3 diapers
*sleeping through the night... woo hoo!  (we are cautiously optimistic that this will stick)  :)
*crawling all over the place!
*pulling up on everything and walking along anything he can hold unto.
*he has stood 2 or 3 times (very briefly) unassisted.
*he loves playing with his toys and gets very excited to come home to them everyday. (he crawls from one toy to the next and just giggles as he plays)
*waves good bye
*claps
*loves hearing music and gets excited when songs come on (he moves his arms up and down really fast)
*takes 4 bottles of formula a day
*eats 3 meals of all table food... he won't allow us to feed him (meal time can get a bit messy)
*still loves bath time!
*still has 0 teeth ....  we're hoping we won't be buying dentures ;) ha!
*knows just how to melt mommy and daddy's heart

We are so excited to see what this ninth month will bring.... we love you Landon Jordan!!!
Here are a few pictures of Landon at 9 months!

My best friend, Tara, is an amazing photographer (she's a teacher, but so generously takes Landon's pictures for me).  She did a 9 month photo shoot of Landon last weekend.... here is a sneak peek of her amazing work and our little red head... yep, his hair definitely has a tint of red!  No idea where that came from!  :)  More pictures from the photo shoot coming soon!

Holding pink balloons for his big sister, Paige!

So serious!  "Mom, why am I sitting on this step?"
Love his dangling little feet!!

Happy little guy!