Friday, January 28, 2011

Due Date

I've been dreading this day for the past month.  My due date.  How quickly life can change and there is nothing we can do to stop it.  How I would love to stay in bed all day and just sleep the day away, pretend it never happened.  Even though it's been nearly a month since Paige went to Heaven I still find myself waking up and feeling my stomach to make sure the past 4 weeks were not just a horrible dream.  It's not a bad dream, it's my life.  Today I am choosing not to focus on what I have lost, but to focus on the blessings of this whole experience.  I am very blessed.
  
   Thank you Jesus for...
                    ... giving me 64 hours with my beautiful daughter. 
                    ... time to hold her and kiss her.
                    ... allowing my entire family to meet her and see her
                        sweet face.
                    ... allowing Paige to open her eye for a split second so we
                        were comforted with knowing she saw her mommy
                        and daddy.
                    ... all the beautiful pictures of our angel.
                    ... the wonderful nurses and doctors that cared so
                        lovingly for my baby girl.
                    ... giving me a husband that lights my world and makes
                        it worth getting up each day.
                    ... family and friends that love me so much.
                   
The list could go on and on.  Although my heart aches and my tears continue to flow I know I'm so very blessed.  And for these blessings I'm thankful.

I love you and miss you Paige!


Posted by Marissa at 8:17 AM

8 comments:

  1. AnonymousJanuary 28, 2011 at 11:13 AM

    You are right this is a extra hard and sad day for all of us. You and Patrick are so strong! We love you very much. Time to pray
    Love Mimi

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  2. Evan and MariaJanuary 28, 2011 at 11:26 AM

    We miss Paige so much too. We think about her constantly. So happy we get to spend the day with you. We love you and Pat and Paige so much and the three of you are such blessings in all of our lives!

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  3. LisaJanuary 28, 2011 at 12:15 PM

    So proud of you guys for seeing the positive on such a tough day. I thought my trip to Boston would be me anxiously awaiting text updates about the arrival of baby Paige. I feel so blessed to have been around when she was born to be able to spend time with my precious niece and her wonderful parents when she was born. I wish you and Patrick peace as you move through this tough milestone in your grief. Love you guys so much!!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousJanuary 28, 2011 at 1:19 PM

    Marissa,
    You, Pat and Paige continue to amaze me. I know Paige is bragging about how proud and strong her parents are. Paige is a lucky girl..in 64 hours of life, she was able to experience more love than most people do in a lifetime. Lots of love, Nickie

    ReplyDelete
  5. Katie ReichJanuary 28, 2011 at 3:53 PM

    Tears come to my eyes every time I think about baby Paige. I continue to pray for your little family every day. I think about you ALL the time! Know that you are not forgotten........prayers are still being said for you. What a sweet baby girl.

    ReplyDelete
  6. AnonymousJanuary 28, 2011 at 5:48 PM

    I have been thinking of you all day. I knew this day would be hard for you. I am so glad that I was able to meet sweet baby Paige. I am so grateful that you had those 64 hours with her. Her life has made people come closer to God, love each other more and brought people together. Some people live until 90 and can't do many of those things.

    Marissa and Pat I feel like I feel your pain everyday. Because your hearts are hurting so much so is mine. I wish I could fix everything and make it better for you. It isn't easy seeing a friend in so much pain. Just remember that I love you guys so much and admire the strength that you have in each other and in God.

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  7. KristyJanuary 28, 2011 at 5:59 PM

    Marissa,
    I have been thinking of you and Pat on such a difficult day. Paige is looking down on her Mommy and Daddy and is SO proud that you are so strong. Only someone with such strong faith could find the blessings at such a difficult time. I think of you all everyday and my heart is aching with you...I continue to send prayers your way for strength to carry on!!!
    Love,
    Kristy

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  8. AnonymousFebruary 2, 2011 at 7:06 AM

    I truly think about you every day. You are in my prayers every night before I go to sleep and pray that you have strength. You are loved by so many Marissa and your blog is absolutely beautiful. Love, Julie

    ReplyDelete

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